Advanced Birthday Celebrations

If your birthday happens to fall over a major holiday, then what do you do?

Celebrate 6 months in advance? Celebrate the week before? Or even 4 weeks before?

Depending on when it is then I guess you celebrate when convenient.

A friend has a child born on Feb 29,  she said they choose which day suits them best Feb 28 or Mar 1, although she says they do try to stick to the same day each year!

Alex is born over a public holiday weekend here in New Zealand. We always celebrate his birthday on the right weekend but when you want to hold a large party then you have to celebrate the week before or after due to everyone going away for the said weekend!

However, the biggest one we have is Steve.....his birthday is Dec 26, Boxing Day.
And this particular year it is important to celebrate due to the fact he is turning........50!

So we discussed it and decided to celebrate his birthday at the beginning of December. Why I hear you ask, well because everyone, including ourselves, are away over the Christmas period (it is our summer holiday after all). We can't celebrate closer to the day because everyone knows this is the manic period of everyones life, what with work functions, school functions and any other organisation function you happen to be involved in.
This week I am out Monday and Wednesday night, the boys have Judo on Tuesday and Thursday and Steve and I both have a work function Friday afternoon/evening. So this is one of our busiest weeks before Christmas.

So this past weekend we had a party to celebrate his 50th Birthday at my mum's house in Rotorua.
Sadly I didn't get pictures of the party in full swing or even of any of the guests having a great time playing pass the parcel! But I did manage a picture of the birthday boy with his birthday cake.

The weather did not cooperate quite how we would have liked it too, but we all had fun anyway.
So thank you to everyone who came and celebrated with us this past weekend. Steve had a wonderful time and loved catching up with family and friends.
Thank you to mum, who kindly loaned us her house for the party and also helped us by doing some of the shopping and helping us cook the food.
It was all delicious and nothing was wasted, in fact for once it was the perfect amount required for the amount of people attending.

I think it was a great way to kick start the festive session ahead.

Nelson Wedding

Of course the main reason we went to Nelson last weekend was to attend the marriage of our Niece Sarah to her partner Joni.

Joni and Sarah

It turned into a wonderful family event that was short and sweet but perfect for what they wanted.

They held the wedding service at a local garden within Nelson that had a wonderful lawn and lots of plants. The gardens apparentlly belonged to the local Council but there was a house in the grounds that was part of a trust. It looked very pretty but we didn't venture in, as you needed money to visit with and also we didn't have time, maybe another visit to Nelson is needed!

The service was very short and sweet and to the point, although the celebrant could have done with a ray of sunshine pierced through her body! Just a little lacking in joy and happiness for the joyous occassion.

We had prepared the boys the week before for the fact that this wedding was not like all the others they had attended, that there was not going to be a groom and more likely 2 brides in pretty dresses. This never fazed them at all and no odd comments were ever made. Amazing what kids accept nowadays, but then guess we never made a deal out of it so it wasn't a deal to them either!

It was a very joyous occassion celebrated by all who attended.

I have lots more fun and cute pictures of Nelson so will organise another post of them later on

Nelson Family

Steve comes from a reasonable size family, he is the youngest of 4.
His sister who is 5 years older than him lives in Wellington, about 6 hours drive away. His next brother, 6 years older, lives up north about 4 hours drive away and then he has his big brother, who is 7 years older!

His big brother lives in Nelson with his wife and they have 3 children. They have lived there for the past 20 odd years, so Nelson is their home.


Steve's brother Ken with granddaughter Kayla and boys

Their 3 children are not little anymore, Sarah the youngest is 28 (one getting married) and she has 2 brothers  Craig 30 and Gareth 31.

Craig and the boys

Craig, Gareth and boys

 These are of course the boy's cousins, the boys love the fact that they have cousins so much older. It was never planned for there to be so much difference between ages but Steve's brother had his kids when he was in his 20's and then Steve finally had his kids when he was in his early 40's so turned into quite an age gap.
Gareth, the oldest, is actually a father himself and has a 3yr old daughter and a 6week old son, so the boys had fun playing with Kayla for the weekend and looking out for her at the wedding.

Me, well that now means I am an Aunty, a young Aunty I may add, seeing as Gareth is only 10 years younger than me!

But with him now having children it also makes me a Great Aunty and oh how I played on this big time at the weekend, it got me lots of hugs and snuggles with Dylan (6wks old).

Kayla (3yrs old)

Kayla and Alex, her new big friend

Dylan (6 weeks)

It was such fun to laugh along with Sarah, Craig and Gareth and then remind them that I was their Aunty and that they had to behave, we all got on really well and it was a lovely way to develope a relationship with people you are just getting to know. Feel like I have cemented my status with them nicely now, which also cements their relationship with Steve (their Uncle) a little better.

Boys Weekend

A couple of weeks ago, whilst catching up on the blogs I follow, one of them (Leisy) talked about how her husband was taking their 3 yr old away over night camping.
I thought what a great idea.
Steve has never done anything like that with our boys and I decided that it was about time he did!

So I went and told him he had to organise a weekend away with each of our boys individually.
We checked the calendar and came up with 2 weekends.

I helped them plan the time away, well with regards to food anyway. I asked them one evening what they wanted for dinner on the Saturday night, Alex knew straight away that he wanted Fish and Chips.
So when I did the shopping I ensured that they had everything they needed food wise. They went late on Friday evening, so dinner was had at home with everyone, then they had to sort out breakfast and lunch for Saturday, dinner was takeaways and then they had to sort breakfast and lunch for Sunday.
They took bikes and scooter, swim stuff and dvd's.
So just over 2 weeks ago Steve and Alex disappeared to the caravan for their weekend away together.
Alex was really excited about this, so was Steve come to think about it!

This was quite significant because Steve has never had nights away with the boys due to his diabetes.
When the boys were little I was always worried about what would happen if he had a hypo in the middle of the night? When they were so little it was very easy to got lost in the moment of looking after them that it was easy to forget to eat. Now this is fine for someone like me who can get really hungry and then eat, for Steve, then his sugars would get really low and he would then probably ignore the headache because the kids needed him and then he would eat wrong and maybe suffer for it later when everything all came to a head in the middle of the night!

Someone once told me, when the boys were little, that it got easier when they were older?
At the time I was head deep in life with them and I couldn't quite believe that this was going to be true, but when they are older it seriously is true, life does get simpler.

But the boys are now older, they are less demanding on your time, you can have 5 minutes to yourself and the world does not come crashing down around you. Time is flexible now not so restrictive, in other words life is fun with them.
So now I am not so worried about Steve, I know that he has the time to eat right and therefore will be ok during the night. I also know that he worries about it when he is with the boys on his own, so I know he won't be stupid and will have dinner at a sensible time etc.

So today is Ben's turn, they are heading away tonight after dinner.
The shopping has been done and they are all set to go.
Steve did take the camera with him when he went with Alex but sadly there were no pictures taken (guess you can tell who takes all the pictures in this family?)

What will I be doing I hear you ask??
Well I get to stay at home with the child who is left behind. As we are still a 1 car family then we don't get to go too far.
Ben enjoyed sleeping in mummy and daddy's bed for the nights and we had an adventure on the bus to a friend's birthday party.
Alex and I will be staying at home, although my brother has told me they will be over this way on Sunday due to my nephew having some soccer games to play, so we will go and join them watching him play his matches.

I also think this may have to become an annual event, 'Daddy and Son weekend away'
I am sure we should do a Mummy and Son weekend away too, but I already get plenty of time with them that I am happy for this to wait a while!
Maybe one year we will think of stepping up from a little weekend away to the caravan to something a little more elaborate? Maybe an over night stay in Auckland or something in a hotel?

Birthday

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday to you

Happy Birthday dear darling husband

Happy Birthday to you

Resting

The plan for the next 2 days was for the boys to go to their respective care places and for Steve and I to have some quiet time at home for him to recover from surgery.

With that in mind, Steve decided that he really wanted to stay on top of his pain, so decided to set the alarm for midnight last night to take more pills, he was then going to reset it for 6am to take the next lot. Seeing as today was going to be a quiet day then that was a good choice.

Unfortunately what we didn't count on was finding Alex crawling around the bed at 10.30pm with a rip roaring temp of 39.9! A quick dose of drugs and juice for him.

So midnight did come and go, and Steve took his pills whilst I leaned to the end of the bed and checked the temp (38.9) on the sleeping child on the mattress on the floor of our room! I decided that I really needed to be close to both of them, so we moved Alex into our room as well.

He fell asleep at midnight so we let him sleep and we woke at 5am. His temp (39.3) was back up again so we dosed him again and called Healthline for further advice (just to be on the safe side and to get some unemotionally attached advice) who adviced we were doing all the right things and just keep going.

We all woke again at 6am for Steve to take more drugs and then we all dosed until 8.30am, when I realised that Ben was downstairs watching tv and really needed to be given breakfast and taken to the Holiday Programme for the day.

So Steve's quiet day at home has changed into a Daddy and Alex quiet day at home watching movies.

Alex's temp has finally broken and is now sitting at about 37 to 37.4, which is satisfactory for me.

Steve is feeling fine and has no pain due to taking pills regularly, so a not too bad day after all.

Balloons and Hands

Steve is home from having his surgery.

All went well and a part from feeling a little spaced from the drugs this morning, he is doing well.

His hand is all bandaged up with a piece of plaster of paris running up the front to stop him bending it. he now needs to keep it up on a pillow or in a sling for a couple of days to assist with not having it swell too much.

He had a skin graft taken from his left hip, just below his underwear line, it is a lovely black and blue colour already from a haematoma but he says it is not painful, just looks nicely bruised!

He has a nice amount of pain relief to keep him nice and comfortable over the next couple of days. He has a Physio appointment on Friday and then sees the surgeon again on Tuesday. Busy time for him but also lots of time to relax and get better.

Ben's school has finished today for the summer holidays, so he is now off until Feb 2010! But we thought of this and he is off to Holiday Programme tomorrow and Thursday so he is not at home to bother Daddy, Alex will be at Daycare for the 2 days, give dad some peace and quiet.

The boys and I decided we wanted to do something for him, so while he was sleeping we blew up lots of balloons and hung them around the dining room.

They say "We Love You Get Well Soon"

It was cheaper than going to the Florists and buying a balloon that said the same thing, plus we had much more fun doing this.

Surgery Time

This is what Steve's left hand currently looks like

It is called Dupuytrens Contracture.

Dupuytren’s contracture is a condition in which tissue in the palm of the hand covering the finger tendons thickens and scars. This tissue becomes tight and shortened, contracting the fingers inwards toward the palm.

The development of Dupuytren’s contracture usually occurs quite slowly over many months, or even years, (in Steve's case it has been develpoing over the last 10 years) though in rare cases it can develop suddenly. It can affect any of the fingers, but it most commonly affects the little finger and ring finger.

Dupuytren’s contracture is a relatively common condition but its cause is not fully understood. In most cases it does not occur until after the age of 40 years (Steve has had this since his early 30's) and it is more common in men than it is in women.
Dupuytren’s contracture runs in families so it is thought that genetics can play a part in the development of the condition. ( No one in his family has this, although my Uncle has, so does that mean our boys are at a higher risk of getting it?) Other factors that increase the likelihood of developing Dupuytren’s contracture include:

• Diabetes (as Steve has this then this will be the underliying cause for him)
• Smoking
• Alcoholism

Once the condition progresses to a point where the condition is limiting or disabling, surgery is usually recommended. Surgery involves removing the excess tissue in the palm and returning function to the fingers.

And this is the stage that we are at now with Steve. In fact today is the day of his surgery to get it fixed on his left hand.
It will involve surgery of just over an hour, where they will remove all the thickened tissue along the tendon on his hand and then his finger will straighten out. Unfortunately this will leave him with a big hole in his hand so they will take some skin from his hip and put a skin graft on to his hand.
So when he wakes up he will have a suture line on his hip and his left hand will be bandaged up with a back slab to stop him moving it!
He will have appointments with the physiotherapist each week to help him to gain use back in his finger.

He also has this disease in his other hand on the same finger, (he will need surgery on that in a couple of years time) his thumbs, his feet and in his groin.

In the picture below you can already see the thickening around the tendon on his little finger on his right hand, but his finger is still relatively straight for now!

However his feet do not bother him so much as he walks on them so this stops the tendon from contracting like his hands due to the weight from his body.

So we are in for a quiet Christmas with me recovering from my neck accident and him out of action with one hand. Don't think we will be getting much done over the holiday time apart from sitting around and enjoying what ever sunny weather we are lucky enough to get!

Work

Steve got offered a new job today :)

So no more worries about Redeployments and Redundancies.

Yea for him

Work

This time it is not my job I am talking about but sadly my husbands.

We moved to Hamilton just under 2 years ago. Steve had been offered a job that he had been interested in for many months and we were very happy when he got offered the job and quite happily accepted.

Unfortunately what I didn't realise is that the job description etc changed a few times over the next couple of months and he began to realise that this maybe wasn't the best move he could have made career wise.
However things moved a long at work and he moved to a different area again, but still doing the same job. When the project finished he got kept in the Project Office and sadly this is where all the hassle has come from.

To cut a long story short, today he started redeployment/redundancy meetings with his managers and the HR department.
His position as he knows it has been dissolved.
They are saying it is due to the economically times of today, but we all know it is part profession and more parts personal.

He hasn't enjoyed the position and so on that aspect this is a good thing because maybe he will find a position that he will want to work at and not just have to work at because there is nothing else to do!
But on the other hand, it is a real kick in the stomach to realise that moving to Hamilton was not the best move ever for his career and that somewhere along the way he has managed to piss someone off and now sadly has more or less been told he is not wanted.

I know in a years time we will look back on this and hopefully be grateful because he is in a better place and happier and be glad it happened, but unfortunately at this present moment we are not.

It hurts, not just for Steve but for me too, watching him have to go through all this. Sitting in a meeting today that they requested I attend and listening to them talk about my husband like that, even though they kept it all professional we all know more or less what they were saying and it was hard.
I have had a very emotional day.

But on the other hand, I am currently on week 4 of a new job and they have been fabulous. They let me leave work today after 4 hours to attend this meeting and when I returned to work they promptly sent me home as they realised I was not really any use to them, but it wasn't done negatively they were all there to support me and help where necessary. They were awesome and I was really grateful to them for their support and advice.

Competition

Steve's office area has started having cooking competitions.
It started with a cake making competition a couple of months ago. This took them a fair few weeks to accomplish.
Steve had to bake a cake one week, at the same time as several other people. Who ever won that week went onto the next round.
Guess what, Steve won his round! Way to go with my Lemon Coconut Cake.

I can't actually remember what he baked for the next round, it was a close call but sadly he didn't make it through.

A couple of weeks ago he informed me that the next competition was all about 'Soups'
So he has been wondering what he could do.
Now bear in mind that he isn't too interested in winning this round at all. Not too fussed on soups, so all he wipped up was the recipe for 'Mild Curried Kumara Soup' oh with a twist, because Steve can not do anything when cooking without a little twist added!
Although when you ask him what he put in it and can he tell you so you can recreate it....the answer is always NO, because sometimes he is not actually sure what it was that he put there!

So today, he took in his soup. Hoping that it was suitable enough for the competition but compared to others, hopefully not good enough to go forward.
Well blow me down, he is cirrently leading for this week.
Due to the nature of it being soups, they are doing 2 soups per day, rather than trying 3-4 soups in one day. So a scoring system has been created. He has to wait until the soups for Thursday have been scored, but currently he is leading this week!

I laughed when I called him to find out how his soup went! Because now, if he wins the week, he only has to come up with another soup to make in a few weeks time!

Anyone got an good soup recipes out there for him to use????

Looking After

Steve woke this morning not feeling great.

He went to work, but after Alex had finished swimming, we went and collected him from work and all came home.

Alex asked why daddy was coming home, so I explained that he was not feeling well.

So Alex decided that daddy could sit on the couch, with him of course, and a blanket, pillow, drink and soft toys (Barney and Kung Fo Panda) and they could sit together snuggled under the blanket and watch a movie.

So that is where they are currently snuggled together.

Insulin Update

Steve went to the Medical Centre Pharmacy and the nice man very nicely gave him the ampule of insulin that he needed. Only cost him $34 and the man said that if he brings his next script there, they will give him a refund discount off of the script due to him having got this one ampule from them.
How nice.
At least that way as well they have history of the drugs he is on and then they will know him.

Insulin

Today has already started out well......!
Here is a conversation Steve and I have already had by 9am on a Saturday morning!

Steve: Oh I seem to be out of my long acting insulin!
Me: Well we better call the pharmacy and see what time they are open today!
Steve: I don't think they are open on a Saturday...!
Me: Well I will try.

Quick call to the pharmacy and discovered that indeed they are not open on a Saturday morning. So the conversation continues....

Me: Well you will have to go to the local Accident and Medical Clinic and see the doctor and get a prescription for the drug you need?
Steve: It's ok, I will be fine!
Me: What?? Till Monday?
Steve: Yes
Me: Well you just call you Dad when you have a hypo at 3am!

His Dad is currently staying with us, but he is almost 80 and is blind. So actually of no help what so ever at 3am.

Now I don't want to take responsibility for this. It is Steve's illness, he is a big boy, he can deal with all of this himself. BUT I am the one that will have to deal with this in the middle of the night when he has a hypo!

I am happy to remind him about the fact his drugs are about to run out, but again he is a big boy and can do it himself.

But for now, he has no long acting insulin and probably won't have any until Monday when I collect his script, which is a little too far away for my liking!

Consequently, Steve has just walked into the study and read this blog as I am writing it! I guess now he understands where I am coming from and has agreed to go to the local Clinic and Pharmacy to see what he can get.

Homework

Ben has a small amount of homework every night from School.
It always consists of reading a little book and going through the new words of the week.
Simple words like "and, I, have, said, here"
He is doing really well with them all, although of course they are now getting harder and it is taking a little bit extra to learn them.

Steve is amazing, he sits with Ben to do the homework and he is fabulous with him.
Now I would like to one day train as a Primary School Teacher, but I sometimes think Steve should change his career path, I think he would make an awesome teacher, although I do already know he is a great teacher because he was a Nurse Educator when I first started dating him.

He just seem to have the knack with teaching Ben how to do things, although sadly he sometimes lacks the patience with him and I feel this would ruin the teaching side.
But for us at home, well I can't wait for Alex to start school so he can have his super duper dad help him with his homework.

Sunday Reading

Today's lesson comes from Kathryn: Chapter 9: Verse 110

"And so as the haze passed at 3am, Kathryn was heard to proclaim to Steve, as part of her monthly nag....Always check your blood sugars before you have your Insulin!"

Here endeth today's lesson

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday to You,

Happy Birthday to You,

Happy Birthday to Steve,

Happy Birthday to You....

Today is my husband's birthday, yes I know, he is a Christmas baby, someone has to be!

I always try to make today extra special, ensure it definitely has a birthday feel to it.

Happy Birthday, love you

Highs and Lows

As I have posted before Steve has diabetes. He has Type 1, which yes, means he injects himself with Insulin up to 4 times a day. He has had it for the last 24 odd years, so this is nothing new.

Yesterday he came home from work and went outside to finish clearing some of the garden. After dinner he spent another hour and a half out there with the boys.
The boys finally went to bed late about 8.30 and him and I sat down to watch a movie. We finally watched 'St Trinians' with Colin Firth and Rupert Everett, it was a good laugh.
In the evenings Steve will sometimes have a snack, keeps him going, and last night was no different although he ony had a snack size packet of chips.
I went to bed about 11.15 and I think he followed a little while later.

At 2.10am I got woken up by Steve as his arm jerked across the bed. I thought Ben was with him and had maybe kicked him, which he is good at doing when he is sleeping with you, but 2 minutes later Steve did it again.
This time I leaned over to check for Ben and realised that he wasn't there, and that got my brain ticking because Steve didn't ask me what I was doing!
I quickly got the light on and there is Steve laid there staring having these jerky movements. Of course the first thing I did was ask him if he was ok and of course all I got back was this glassy eyed stare.
Now you have to remember that it is 2am and I have just woken out of a deep sleep, so the brain doesn't work as fast as normal at that time. So of course it took me more than a second to realise that he was having a hypo.
So I quickly got a chocolate bar from the box by his bed and then had to ask him to eat it!
It is very weird asking someone who is not communicating with you, who doesn't have any idea what is going on, who probably at that moment thinks the world is a triangle and that green men do exsist! to eat a chocolate bar. Infact after this time Steve asked me why I had woken him up? Because they have no idea this has happened until they come out of it when they go very low.
Luckily for me this time he happily opened his mouth and chewed the bar down, in fact he happily chewed down 4 mini choc bars and a whole glass of juice. The problem I have is that I don't want to give him too much because otherwise then you make him feel like crap because his blood sugar goes so high, but you need enough to get him out of the hypo. The other problem is there is not an instant reaction, in fact last night it took 20 minutes before he was actually talking sensible to me. In hind sight I should have jabbed him with the small glucose injection I have, but as he was able to eat for me then I went down that route instead, but I suppose I could have done both, but hey, there is no manual for this sort of thing, it is a feel as you go situation at 2am all on your own! If I can get him to eat for me then I can get him out of it on my own, but if he is unable to eat then I jab him at the same time as calling for an ambulance. They don't ever have to take him to hospital, but when you have an uncooperative semi consious man help is always nice.

Is it scary? Well my heart is racing the whole time, it is a pain having to race down the stairs to get stuff from the kitchen.
Am I scared of him? Sometimes, unfortunately they get snappy when having a hypo and you are never sure what they will do, although when they go as low as Steve did last night I kinda had no worries as he was never going to be able to physically move off the bed so I knew he was in no harm. You have to use humour during the episode beacuse otherwise you get annoyed with them and they can't help it.
Last night I couldn't work out how to use the blood sampling kit, couldn't get the stabbing pen to work, so there I am trying to test his blood, but I was actually unable to get any. I finally got some with his help after he had come round enough to assist me.
That is the other problem, this is not a regular occurance so 18 months can go by and in that time I kinda forget the silly little things or more to the point I don't forget them but your brain is not thinking straight at 2am when you are suddenly woken out of a deep sleep!

What happened last night....well he informed me that he had forgotten to have his drugs after dinner, so he took them before he came to bed. No problem with that but he forgot a few vital things to take into consideration at the time...

1. He didn't test his blood to see what it was so he could adjust the amount to take
2. He forgot to take into consideration that he had used a lot of energy in the garden after dinner, thus burning off a lot of what he had eaten and therefore not needing as much insulin.
3. He hadn't eaten much during the evening
4. He took his drugs so close to going to bed that due to points 2 & 3 when the insulin took his blood sugar so low he was in a very deep sleep so he didn't wake up when it started to go low, thus the reason his body woke him, sort of, when it got very low and he was now past the point of being able to help himself.

It is difficult to get annoyed with him, you can't at 2am and then at 7am it doesn't have as much kick to the annoyance. But this is what does scare me.....

We have 2 gorgeous boys, who are a little too young to know what is going on. If I wasn't there last night what would have happened? The boys wouldn't have found him until 6/7am.

My best friend thought it was weird when she realised that I had never had a night away from Steve and the boys on my own. But when I explained to her that I have 3 people to think about at night she kinda saw my point. My first ever night away was at my Hen's Party, it crossed my mind several times and Steve told me to go away one of the times I called home, but it was too bad, I had to call so I knew all was ok at home.

He did spend 3 weeks on his own last year when we moved to Hamilton, so I know he is a big boy and can look after himself, and I have to keep remembering that when I go away, but it still doesn't make it any easier, because I think about the boys.

Oh well, that is a big look into what I live with. Don't get me wrong, this is a rare happening. As I mentioned this was the first time for 18 months that has happened in the night and I have had to assist with. So life is pretty normal to us, just every now and then it has some drama!

Joys of Parenting

I can honestly say that I was the one to instigate having children in this relationship.
Steve has been married before and children was not something that was going to happen in that relationship, so when I met him, children were not really on the agenda.
It took me several years before he agreed to children and I think I can honestly say, that even with the bad days, he still wouldn't change any of it.
To prove my point, yesterday I woke just after 6am to hear Steve and the boys in the boys room singing 'Miss Polly had a Dolly'
Seems Steve had taken Ben back in the middle of the night and ended up sleeping with Ben, because his bed was cold and he wanted daddy to warm it up for him.
When Alex woke up he joined them and Ben then put the light on, got out some books and started reading with daddy, one of the books was 'Miss Polly'

Last night Steve was telling me all about it and we were laughing so much, about how Ben was the leader and instigated the reading session and also about the fact that I wondered if Steve ever thought in his life he would be singing Nursery Rhymes at 6am!

Guess that is parenting for you.

Hamilton Up Date

To keep up with how things are going in Hamilton, check out here.
Steve is now working in Hamilton, will only see him on weekends until I move down in 3 weeks time!